How I Make My Buyers’ Offers Stand Out While Respecting Fair Housing Laws
There was a time when writing a personal letter to a home seller was a fairly common strategy, particularly in competitive real estate markets.
Buyers would introduce themselves, share details about their lives, explain why they had fallen in love with the home, and hope their story resonated with the seller.
Sometimes they even included family photographs.
The idea was simple: if a seller had multiple offers, perhaps a personal connection would make one buyer stand out.
And I understand the appeal. Buying and selling a home is emotional. Sellers often have years of memories associated with a property, and buyers can feel a strong connection to a home the moment they walk through the door.
But traditional buyer love letters have largely fallen out of favor among real estate professionals, and for good reason.
They can create serious Fair Housing concerns.
I’m Erin McCormick, a Realtor with Keller Williams Vermont, and I believe there are much better ways to make an offer stand out than sharing personal details that have nothing to do with a buyer’s ability to purchase the property.
In fact, one of the things I prioritize when representing buyers is preparing a thoughtful, organized offer presentation that communicates the strength of the offer, addresses the seller’s priorities, and, when appropriate, acknowledges specific things my buyers appreciate about the property.
Because I believe an offer can be personal and thoughtful without making the buyer’s personal identity part of the seller’s decision.
What Is a Buyer Love Letter?
A buyer love letter is a personal note submitted alongside a purchase offer, typically intended to create an emotional connection between the buyer and seller.
These letters often describe the buyer’s life, family, background, or future plans for the home.
A buyer might talk about raising children in the house, celebrating holidays around the fireplace, or wanting to become part of a particular community.
While those details may seem harmless, they can reveal information about characteristics protected under Fair Housing laws.
And that’s where the problem begins.
A seller should be evaluating offers based on legitimate transaction-related factors, such as price, financing, contingencies, closing timelines, and the likelihood of a successful closing.
They shouldn’t be choosing one buyer over another because of who that person is, what religion they practice, whether they have children, or other protected personal characteristics.
Traditional love letters can introduce precisely that kind of information into the decision-making process.
Why Fair Housing Matters
The federal Fair Housing Act was established to protect people from discrimination in housing.
It prohibits discrimination based on race, color, religion, national origin, sex, familial status, and disability.
Vermont’s Fair Housing laws go further, protecting additional characteristics, including age, marital status, sexual orientation, gender identity, receipt of public assistance, citizenship, immigration status, and other legally protected circumstances.
These protections matter because access to housing shouldn’t depend on whether someone looks like you, shares your beliefs, has a similar family structure, or fits your personal idea of who should live in a particular home.
And discrimination isn’t always obvious or intentional.
Sometimes people are naturally drawn to others who remind them of themselves.
A seller might read a letter and feel connected to a buyer because they share a similar background or life experience.
But when that connection involves protected characteristics, allowing it to influence the selection of an offer can create a Fair Housing problem.
That’s why I take the issue seriously.
Every qualified buyer deserves to have their offer considered fairly, based on its merits rather than their personal identity.
Fair Housing isn’t just about complying with a law. It’s about creating a real estate market where people have an equitable opportunity to purchase a home.
Are Buyer Love Letters Actually Illegal?
This is an important distinction.
Traditional buyer love letters aren’t universally prohibited by law.
However, the National Association of REALTORS® has warned about the Fair Housing risks associated with them, and many brokerages and real estate professionals discourage their use.
Some listing agents and sellers choose not to accept them at all.
The concern isn’t simply that a buyer has written a letter. It’s that the letter may reveal protected personal information that could improperly influence a seller’s decision.
I don’t believe that risk is necessary to create a compelling offer.
And I certainly don’t want to put my buyers, the sellers, or the professionals involved in a transaction in a position where personal characteristics become part of the negotiation.
But I Still Want Sellers to Know What My Buyers Appreciate About Their Home
Here’s where my approach is a little different from simply submitting an offer without any context.
I believe a thoughtful offer presentation can help communicate that my buyer is serious, has carefully considered the property, and appreciates what makes it special.
And I think there’s a meaningful distinction between talking about the buyer’s personal circumstances and talking about the property itself.
For example, I might share that my buyer was particularly impressed by the craftsmanship of the original woodwork, the thoughtful renovations, or the care that has clearly gone into maintaining the home.
Maybe they appreciated the landscaping, the architectural details, or the way the property has been preserved.
Those are observations about the home.
They don’t require sharing whether the buyer is married, has children, practices a particular religion, or belongs to any other protected group.
And I believe they can still convey genuine appreciation.
Focus on the Property, Not the Person
Here’s an example of the distinction.
A traditional love letter might explain how a buyer dreams of raising their children in the house and celebrating Christmas around the fireplace.
That’s the type of personal narrative I avoid because it introduces information related to familial status and potentially religion.
Instead, if appropriate and consistent with the listing side’s preferences and brokerage guidance, my offer presentation might include a simple observation:
My buyer particularly appreciated the home’s original fireplace, beautifully maintained woodwork, and the attention to detail throughout the property.
That communicates something meaningful about the home without introducing the buyer’s protected personal characteristics.
And it keeps the seller’s attention where it belongs: on the property and the terms of the offer.
Of course, even property-focused comments should be handled thoughtfully. They should never become a disguised way to communicate personal characteristics, and I respect any seller or listing brokerage policy against additional buyer narratives.
My Offer Presentation Is About Much More Than Price
When I submit an offer on behalf of a buyer, I want the listing agent and seller to be able to understand it clearly.
That may sound obvious, but real estate offers can involve a surprising number of moving parts.
Purchase price is important, but so are financing terms, contingencies, deposits, closing dates, and any special conditions.
A higher offer isn’t always the strongest offer if it introduces significant uncertainty or doesn’t align with the seller’s priorities.
That’s why I take time to organize the presentation and explain the relevant terms.
I want the listing agent to understand what we’re proposing and why it may be attractive to the seller.
If my buyer is preapproved, I want the appropriate documentation available.
If we’ve structured an inspection contingency thoughtfully, I want the terms to be clear.
If we’re offering flexibility around the closing date, I want the seller to understand that flexibility.
And if there are particular logistical considerations we’ve addressed, I want to make those easy to identify.
A well-presented offer can demonstrate preparation, professionalism, and an understanding of the transaction.
It doesn’t need an emotional appeal based on personal identity to accomplish that.
I Want to Understand What Matters to the Seller
One of the first things I often do when preparing an offer is contact the listing agent.
I’m not simply calling to ask how many offers they have.
I want to understand whether there are legitimate priorities or circumstances that could help us structure a stronger offer.
Is the seller hoping for a quick closing? Would additional time be helpful? Are there particular logistical concerns that need to be addressed?
Perhaps the seller is relocating and wants flexibility with their moving timeline.
Maybe they would prefer not to handle certain agreed-upon items remaining at the property.
Or perhaps their greatest priority is certainty that the transaction will close successfully.
Understanding those needs can help us create an offer that is attractive for reasons beyond the purchase price.
And unlike a buyer love letter, those are factors directly related to the transaction.
I believe this is a much more effective way to negotiate.
Rather than asking a seller to choose my buyer because they feel an emotional connection to the buyer’s life story, I’m looking for ways to make the actual terms of the transaction work better for both parties.
The Way an Offer Is Presented Reflects on the Buyer
I also think it’s important to recognize that the offer presentation is often the listing agent’s first meaningful interaction with the buyer’s agent.
And first impressions matter.
If an offer arrives with missing documents, confusing terms, or unclear communication, that may create unnecessary questions about how the rest of the transaction will unfold.
On the other hand, a complete, organized offer with thoughtful terms and clear communication can help establish a productive professional relationship.
I want the listing agent to know that I’m responsive, detail-oriented, and prepared to work collaboratively to keep the transaction moving.
That doesn’t mean I won’t negotiate firmly on behalf of my client.
It means I understand that professionalism and effective advocacy aren’t mutually exclusive.
And when a seller is comparing offers, the clarity and reliability of the process may matter alongside the financial terms.
What If I’m Representing the Seller?
Fair Housing is equally important when I’m representing a seller.
My responsibility is to help my client understand and evaluate offers based on appropriate, objective considerations.
That means comparing the purchase price, financing, contingencies, timing, and other legitimate contractual factors.
If a buyer or another agent wants to submit a personal love letter, I believe it’s important to explain the Fair Housing concerns and follow applicable law, brokerage policies, and the seller’s lawful instructions.
I don’t want personal photographs or stories about a buyer’s background influencing a decision that should be based on the offer itself.
And I want to help sellers understand that choosing an offer based on protected personal characteristics can create legal and ethical problems, even when the decision feels well-intentioned.
A seller is entitled to consider the legitimate strengths and weaknesses of competing offers.
But those considerations should remain connected to the transaction, not the personal identity of the people hoping to purchase the home.
You Can Be a Strong Advocate and Still Be Fair
I think there’s sometimes a misconception that Fair Housing compliance somehow limits an agent’s ability to negotiate creatively or advocate effectively.
I see it differently.
I believe the strongest representation comes from understanding the market, knowing the property, communicating clearly, and developing an offer strategy that reflects the buyer’s goals and the seller’s priorities.
There are plenty of ways to make an offer competitive without introducing personal information that shouldn’t influence the decision.
We can discuss price, financing, deposits, contingencies, closing timelines, and other terms that are appropriate for the particular transaction.
We can make sure the offer is complete, accurate, and easy to understand.
And when appropriate, we can communicate genuine appreciation for the property’s features without sharing personal characteristics.
None of that requires compromising Fair Housing principles.
In fact, I think being thoughtful about these boundaries is part of what makes someone a good Realtor.
Why This Matters to Me
I’ve spent much of my career working in real estate leadership, operations, marketing, and consulting, and those experiences have reinforced how important professional standards are.
Real estate agents have significant responsibilities.
We’re helping people navigate major financial decisions, advocating for their interests, and participating in a housing market that should be accessible without discrimination.
I believe those responsibilities require more than simply knowing how to write an offer.
They require judgment, integrity, and an understanding of how our actions can affect other people.
I want my buyers to feel confident that I’m presenting their offers thoughtfully and strategically.
I want my sellers to feel confident that I’m helping them evaluate offers fairly and responsibly.
And I want the professionals I work with to know that I take my ethical obligations seriously.
A Thoughtful Offer Doesn’t Need a Love Letter
Buying a home is emotional. I understand that, and I love seeing buyers connect with a property.
I also recognize that selling a home can be emotional, particularly when someone has spent years caring for it.
There’s nothing wrong with appreciating that connection.
But I don’t believe a seller needs to know a buyer’s personal story to recognize a strong offer.
I’d rather focus on what actually matters to the transaction: clear terms, thoughtful preparation, financial qualifications, reasonable expectations, and professional communication.
And if there’s an appropriate opportunity to mention what my buyer appreciated about the home itself, I can do that without making their personal identity part of the conversation.
The goal isn’t to make the seller fall in love with my buyer. It’s to help the seller feel confident in the offer.
That’s how I approach buyer representation in Vermont: strategically, thoughtfully, and with a commitment to Fair Housing and professional integrity.
If you’re thinking about buying a home in Vermont, I’d love to help you develop an offer strategy that reflects your goals, protects your interests, and gives you the strongest opportunity possible without compromising the principles that matter.
Let's Talk About Buying a Home in Vermont
Erin McCormick | Realtor, Keller Williams Vermont
Founder, Travel Like a Local® Vermont | Live Local Vermont
This article is for general educational purposes and does not constitute legal advice. Offer presentation practices should comply with applicable Fair Housing laws, brokerage policies, and professional guidance.